QUID HAS HEARD that President Donald Trump is ready to prove how he really is a yuge-hands-on president. New edicts to and from the Transportation Security Administration are making that perfectly clear, and it’s got your faithful hack hankering for a plane ride. Seems that the agency that makes sure America’s airline passengers don’t try to sneak on extra shampoo or babyfood with their pistols as they live the life in coach at 36,000 feet, are getting even more involved in their body of work. Perhaps emboldened by the election of the National Rifle Association’s most popular TV personality since Ted Nugent, more Americans than ever are trying to sneak their guns onto airplanes. Apparently these prohibited gats are so inconspicuous, or their hosts are so concealing, that the only way to be sure Granny hasn’t gotten her gun is to feel her up good as you pat her down inthe security line at DIA. Having won one for the Groper, TSA officials let the world know that the little brush against the goodies you’ve gotten in the past is nothing compared to the junk jingle and full-throttle jabs you can expect in the near future. Quid feels your pain, with some luck.
AND QUID HAS HEARD that Colorado’s coyest candidate for governor in 2018 needs a little push into the state political limelight. Seems that Colorado’s most obvious and anxious guy going for the gold dome is Arapahoe County’s own District Attorney George “who-?-me-?-run-for-governor-?” Brauchler. Truth be told, and, dear reader, that’s what this enemy of the people is all about, your faithful hack is surprised Brauchler didn’t fill out the gubernatorial papers at the same time he re-ran for DA last year. While the list of Republicans salivating for Colorado’s hot seat is growing fast, Brauchler hasn’t penned his name to it. Despite that, his public comments and suddenly very public promotion to colonel in the Colorado National Guard, accompanied by a host of handsome military uniform photos, are total breathtaking click bait for those conservative types — must-haves for candidates with Rs. If there’s any doubt about a gubernatorial campaign just busting to get going, peruse this toughy-feely seeker of justice’s Twitter feed. Not alot of DA’s in this state are keenly interested in Colorado’s economics, charter schools, PERA, Boy Scouts, a little RussiaGate humor, jobs in Burlington, and long arguments with PBS TV barking dog John Ferrugia. The real proof Brauchler is itching to launch that statewide campaign? Love letters to GOP toad state Sen. Jerry Sonnenberg and poetic perusings about how beautiful the winter drive to Morgan County is. Dude. It’s dead grass and bored cows. Get a campaign.
AND THAT’S ALL THE NEWS THAT FITS.