PERRY: Top 10 reasons to laugh your butt off about Romney today

Thanks to Mitt Romney, millions of Americans now know the meaning of the word, "plutocrat."

BY DAVE PERRY, Aurora Sentinel editor

Ten facts for Sunday from Aurora’s most despised liberal — me:

1. Romney scheduled his big Littleton push to win Colorado’s hearts and votes today at the same time as the Broncos game. Snort.

2. D’Evelyn School, a Jeffco school where Romney has chosen to speak at 5:30 p.m., is heralded for top test scores in the state and boasts that “all students, not just an elite group, should be held to rigorous academic and behavioral standards.”

3. The 1,100-student school has 5 black kids, and a whopping 5 percent of the students qualify for free and reduced lunch. Nothing elite about that, as long as you’re Mitt Romney.

4. His campaign staff has not been fired yet.

5. Sarah Palin is now giving advice to Romney on how to save his campaign.

6. Thanks to Mitt Romney, millions of Americans now know the meaning of the word, “plutocrat.”

7. Romney promised this weekend that Obama is going to make the United States like Europe and Canada. Like in Germany, where everyone gets jobs, health care, retirement, long vacations, good salaries, killer roads and bridges, and you get to keep all of the best wines and beers for yourself. (YAY!) The downside is, Obama said he’s not. (BUMMER)

8. Responding to intense criticism that all he cares about is raising cash, Romney went to San Diego and told 650 supporters who paid him $6 million to gather at Grand Del Mar, a luxury hotel and told everyone that his campaign schedule has been hectic. He said he “won’t be able to go home tonight.” According to an AP story Sunday:

He told the audience he spent the night before raising money at a San Francisco area mansion.

“Property up there is, I’m sure, very, very expensive. And we got to her driveway — it was at least a mile long, up and up, it’s like, Oh my goodness, how in the world?” Romney said. “And then we came to the home, and it was like San Simeon, you know, the Hearst castle. It was this beautiful home with gardens, manicured gardens, and a pool and a topiary and so forth.”

9.  The famously conservative newspaper columnist Peggy Noonan apologized for calling the Romney campaign “incompetent.” After taking serious heat from other conservatives, she wrote in her Wall Street Journal slot Friday:

“This week I called it incompetent, but only because I was being polite. I really meant ‘rolling calamity.'”

10.  While campaigning in Wisconsin, Green Bay Packers players Jermichael Finley and linebacker Desmond Bishop as well as baseball icon Hank Aaron turned out to support Obama. While campaigning in San Diego. Romney has his own celebrity fan club, which boasts Robin Leach, Scott Baio and Marie and Donny Osmond.

Any questions now about who to vote for?

Reach editor Dave Perry at 303-750-7555 or dperry@aurorasentinel.com

  • irate voter

    Not you that is for sure!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! You should be fired !!!!!!!!!!!

  • Tom the Rod

    I am waiting for your editorial in regard to you personally being a witness to obama walking on water after he explains how he was able to purchase a million and a half dollar home on his not-for-profit wages. Love your independence and your attempted educational endeavors where we, the readers are concerned!

  • jkirchmer@denverpost.com

    Very droll, but not as humorous as trying to finding the residents of the 51st, the 52nd and the 53rd state that Obama has yet to visit.

FindIt!